With Halloween fast approaching Kayleigh and I are trying to iron out what we're going be and what we're going to do for one of our favorite holidays. To get some inspiration for the former, last Saturday I joined another meetup, this time bound for the nighttime-only haunted amusement park infamously known as Spookers. The site and buildings were part of an old insane asylum that have been brilliantly co-opted into a frightening attraction geared towards adults. I happened to stumble across a description of the place in our guidebook shortly after we arrived in NZ, and I was resolved to test my courage with a visit. There was just one problem…I couldn't find any willing victims to accompany me on my mad quest for terror! Kayleigh wanted nothing to do with it, and soliciting the idea to my work mates likewise proved fruitless. Everyone seemed to have been so frightened by their first visit that they had dropped their spines on their mad dash for the door, screaming for mum all the way home. Even Ryan, our policeman roomy who deals with REAL dangers on a frequent basis, left me high and dry! My interest was piqued by the confessions of these ninnies. So you can imagine my delight when one of the women I'd met during laser tag mentioned that she was organizing a meetup to go. I signed up the moment I got home.
Then the night finally came. Admittedly I was a little nervous. I hopped into the van and began my 40 minute drive to the outskirts of town. I was alone. The drive itself seemed to build on the tension. Once off the highway the country roads were dark and quiet. I drove for 15 minutes down the unfamiliar road alone and in the dark to meet up with a group of strangers in an old building that once housed the clinically insane. The grounds were plantation style, and you could hear the patrons screaming from the parking lot. Just another satisfied customer. After parking and grabbing my tickets, I met up with the group and the horror fest began.
The first attraction was the Freaky Forest and our large group was split into small groups of 5, with 2 flashlights per group we were slowly let in. I took the lead (and the light) upon nobody else's willingness to do so. The forest pathway wasn't very well lit, forcing you to rely on your flashlight which was a good source of tension. Just a few steps past the entry and I heard the roar of a chainsaw engine coming to life as a clown burst out from behind the structure we just walked through. So far so good, I'm digging this place. We continued down the pathway, walking through various scenes such as a swamp, an old shed, and a hillbilly's cabin. Each scene was complete with a matching set of actors that usually revealed themselves suddenly with intent to startle you. The thing is, being the leading member of the group, the actors would let me pass first and startle the members in the middle or target the tailing member. To compound the issue, when they were positioning themselves for the party to pass through, I could hear them crunching on the leaves which gave away their positions. I had also expected the forest to be more of a free roaming experience rather than an on rails one, but probably for the safety of the guests and the liability of the park, it was not. Despite these shortcomings, I enjoyed myself, even if I had not peed myself as I had wanted.
The next attraction was the haunted house set in the building that acted as the primary facility for the old insane asylum. I again took the lead and we started our way through the twisting corridors of the building. I quickly gained a preference for this setting over the forest due to the tight, claustrophobic nature of it. The scenes were arranged in various rooms that you could peer into as you walked along the main corridor. As we walked along we glimpsed a medical wing, a morgue, a bathroom and a nursery. There was even a monster mash type scene with Rob Zombie and Disturbed blasting in the background, which of course made my heart happy. The scenes just seemed more compelling. There was one actress I remember being particularly great - a shower room in which a girl was picking at her wrists with a knife in a sort of dissociated mania. When we came into the doorway she slowly looked up with a passive acknowledgment that made it unclear whether she was looking at us or through us. I even got startled a few times. Unfortunately due to the no pictures policy, you'll have to use your imagination to create their fiendish faces and places. Come to think of it, it's better that way.
It's not very often you find a good, adult oriented haunted house. Every Halloween I go on the lookout for one, and while I don't think Spookers was as scary as it was built up to be, it was certainly the most ambitious I've ever seen. I had a great time and I will definitely be going back for the two attractions I missed, being Disturbia (evil carnival themed) and the Corn Maze which is only open during summer and fall. Apparently they used to have a hospital attraction, but the building was allegedly really haunted and the actors and patrons became too frightened, so it was shut down. Perhaps it was that attraction that stole the courage of all those didn't dare to return and gave Spookers its terrifying reputation. Now I'll leave you with something that is truly terrifying...
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| my ugly mug! |
